A Polish man had married a Canadian girl after he had been in Canada for a year or so and although his English was far from perfect, the couple got on well.
One day, though, he rushed into a lawyer’s office and asked if he could arrange for a divorce for him….”very quick!!!” The lawyer explained that the speed of getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances and asked these questions:
Lawyer; “Have you any grounds?!”
Polish man; “An acre and a half and a nice 3 bedroom house!!”
Lawyer; “No, I mean what is the foundation of the case?!”
Polish man; “It is made of concrete, bricks and mortar!!”
Lawyer; “Does either of you have a real grudge?!”
Polish man; “No, we have a carport…. don’t need a grudge!!”
Lawyer; “I mean, what are your relations like?!”
Polish man; “All my relations live in Poland!!”
Lawyer; “Is there any infidelity in your marriage?!”
Polish man; “Yes…. we have hi-fidelity stereo set and DVD player with 6.1 surround sound!!”
Lawyer; “No, I mean does your wife beat you up?!”
Polish man; “No, I’m always up before her!!”
Lawyer; “why do you want this divorce?!”
Polish man; “She is going to kill me!!!!”
Lawyer; “What makes you think that?!”
Polish man; “I got proof!!”
Lawyer; “What kind of proof?!”
Polish man; “She going to poison me. She buy bottle at drug store and I read label. It say…. POLISH REMOVER!!!!